i physically DESPISE when people say "tho". you sound like a fucking idiot. i was scrolling down my newsfeed on facebook and suddenly "i can't stop laughing tho." "i wanna meet mgk tho." *though what? who is stopping you from meeting mgk? nobody. so stop wasting your time writing "tho" after EVERYTHING and go meet him. i hate uneducated people, and i hate people who sound uneducated because they write stupid shit like "tho". i know this is a short rant, but i just can't find the words to express how much i hate the idiocy behind this. but you know, that may just be me.
 
so i stumbled upon this nifty website. it taught me things i didn't know, and reminded me of things i already knew, cause i'm a fucking genius.  

  •   A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.
  •   A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
  •   A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue.
  •   A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.
  •   A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
  •   A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
  •   A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.
  •   A snail can sleep for three years.
  •   Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.
  •   All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.
  •   Almonds are a member of the peach family.
  •   An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
  •   Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.
  •   Butterflies taste with their feet.
  •   Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds.
  •   Dogs only have about 10.
  •   "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt."
  •   February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.
  •   In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.
  •   If the population of China walked past you, in single file the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.
  •   If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights.
  •   It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
  •   Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.
  •   Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable
  •   No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.
  •   On a Canadian two dollar bill (that no longer exists), the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag.
  •   Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
  •   Peanuts are one of the ingredients in dynamite.
  •   Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.
  •   "Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand;"lollipop" with your right.
  •   The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.
  •   The Bible does not say there were three wise men; it only says there were three gifts.
  •   The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.
  •   The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
  •   The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.
  •   The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.
  •   The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).
  •   There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.
  •   There are more chickens than people in the world.
  •   There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and
      hazardous.
  •   There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious."
  •   There's no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewables Vitamins.
  •   Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.
  •   TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
  •   Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.
  •    Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
  •   Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself.

i hope you learned something new! i did, but you know, that's just me. ;3


 
i hate people that say this. or say things like "fuck is a fucking word you can put anyfuckingwhere in a fucking sentence without fucking changing it's fucking meaning." FUCKING BULLSHIT. last time i checked, "i fucking love those kids" and "i love fucking those kids" do NOT mean the same thing. pervert. nice fucking try though. it annoys me. so many people believe that fuck can be put anywhere without changing the meaning. these people are stupid. and these people are probably you. i hate stupid people. i'm talking about the people that comment "jump" on a picture that says "comment jump and see what happens". IT'S A PICTURE MOTHERFUCKER. no matter what you comment nothing will fucking happen, i motherfucking promise. stop being stupid. or drink some bleach. i hate stupid people, but you know, that's just me.
 
hierarchy [hahy-uh-rahr-kee]. THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT? let's spell it like it's pronounced. hi-are-key (or hi-er-are-key). so obviously it's spelt hierarchy. makes fucking sense. the english language is a big dumb bitch. hi-er-are-key = hierarchy. why? because fuck you that's why. magical fucking language. i just hate stupid spellings. they're fucking... stupid. or what about the military rank colonel spelt kernel. is that motherfucker the pre-popcorn? no. so shut the fuck up. i raged on google about this and look at all these words i found.

agatospia: admiration of a particular part of someone's body.
so if you like someone's fucking ear, that's agastopic of you.

bibble: to drink often; to eat and/or drink noisily.
why be an alcoholic when you can be bibble.

cabotage: coastal navigation; the exclusive right of a country to control the air traffic within its borders.
sounds like cabbage sabotage. the sidenote said: NOT to sabotage with cabbage and/or vermont cabot cheese. dammit. i love sabotaging planes in my countries airspace with vermont cheese...

doodle sack: an old english word for bagpipe.
in my free time i like to blow on my doodle sack.

 erinaceous: f, pertaining to, or resembling a hedgehog.
you're erinaceous.

firman: in turkey and some other oriental countries, a decree or mandate issued by the sovereign.
yeah motherfucker, firman and sheet.

gabelle: a tax on salt.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP AND STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT THE UNSALTED PORK TINY TIM. YOU WANNA PAY THE FUCKING GABELLE? DIDN'T THINK SO, BITCH." cause you know... there's no tax on pepper.. just salt...

halfpace: a platform of a staircase where the stair turns back in exactly the reverse direction of the lower flight.
sounds british. yuck.

impignorate: to pawn or mortgage something.
this made me think of impregnating a pig.... LOL, and the note said "NOT to impregnate a pig." motherfuckers read my mind.

jentacular: pertaining to breakfast.
eggs and stuff....

 kakorrhaphiophobia: fear of failure.
i was scared of failing to spell that bitch word properly.

lamprophony: loudness and clarity of enunciation
SUH-TOP BE-ING SO LAMP-RO-PHONY.

macrosmatic: having a good sense of smell.
"i smell hot dogs." "how macrosmatic of you."

nudiustertian: the day before yesterday.
i'd rather just say the day before yesterday.

oxter: outdated word meaning armpit.
totally using this word from now on.

pauciloquent: uttering few words; brief in speech.
paciloquent wouldn't be pauciloquent?

quire: two dozen sheets of paper.
let's go to staples and confuse employees! wooh!

ratoon: a small shoot growing from the root of a plant.
love them there ratoons. yeeup.

salopettes: high-wasited skiing pants with shoulder straps.
ew.

tittynope: a small quantity of something left over.
this is my favourite word ever. i'm always gonna leave a little bit of left overs so i can say it all the time.

ulotrichous: having wooly or crispy hair.
yuck.

valetudinarian: a sickly or weak person, especially one who is constantly and morbidly concerned with his or her health.
that would suck..

winklypicker: style of shoe or boot in the 1950s with a sharp and long pointed toe.
a close second to 'tittynope' in the eyebrow-raiser category.

xertz: to gulp down quickly and greedily.
starving babies.

yarborough: hand of cards containing no card above a nine.
use THIS word everyday.

zoanthropy: delusion of a person who believes himself changed into an animal.
that's hot.


 
they aren’t gamer girls. they’re whores who found an xbox controller (i say xbox because i refuse to support gaystation). posting pictures in slutty clothing holding an xbox controller? i game so much it’s ridiculous, and i have never nor will i ever post a picture of myself holding an xbox controller. girls post pictures to impress guys. i’m sorry, do you think that if a guy sees you with a gaming controller they’re just gonna fall in love? no. what do you play? black ops zombies? shocker. playing a bonus feature of a game, such as black ops zombies, is not gaming. it’s try hard pathetic. and i can almost guarantee that you suck raging boners at every game you play. i soloed 56 on der riese on zombies. and don’t get me wrong, sure, some girls do game, but if you post pictures of yourself gaming then you don’t do it because you enjoy, you do it because you’re an attention whore. i honestly wouldn’t be shocked if some bitches just bought an xbox controller (had no xbox or anything, just the controller) and just did a fucking photo shoot. put down the xbox controller and go back to your corner. i find it astounding what some retards do for attention, but you know, that’s just me.

 
this is more or less a personal rant, but i'm sure many people can still relate. I HATE WORKING IN THE MORNING. working in the afternoons 3 - 11 (or 4 - 11 after school) is actually fun because everyone's so chill. i hate it and dread it on my way there, but once i get onto the floor i actually don't mind it. but days where i have to work 6am - 2pm make me want to start world war fucking three. tonight (friday) i have to work 4 - 11, the very next day i have to work 6am - 2pm. so basically, i get off at 11, buy something to eat and go home. i get home around 11:30 and go on the internet machine for half an hour when suddenly it's 12:30 or 1:00 in the morning. i then start calculating. "alright. i work at 6:00, have to leave at 5:30, i need to shower and do my makeup and put on my uniform and other rainbolic* things, so i should wake up at about 4:00 in the morning. so it's 1:00, and i have to wake up in 3 hours to work an 8 hour shift in the morning at the busiest store in town in the morning." so then i shut down my laptop, and roll over to go to sleep. which is usually when i decide to be more restless and energetic than ever. next thing i know i'm crashed and it's 5:30 and my father is yelling at me to wake up because my phone alarm and my alarm failed to do the one job they were required to do. i'll put money on those events. i should probably just pull an all nighter and chug back massive amounts of coffee. anyway. that's my rant of hatred towards the morning time. RRRRRAGHRRR. i hate mornings. i hate work. i DESPISE working in the mornings. but you know, that's just me.


* rainbolic = something of the wonderful-osity of a rainbow. ex: cheesecake is rainbolic with a side of magical unicorns.
 
hypocrisy, hypocrisy everywhere. (hypocrisy... that's ACTUALLY how it's spelt. fucking stupid spelling. like wtf? ANYSLUT.) i hate hypocrits. you can't do this, but i can. fuck you sir, fuck you. i hate being controlled, and i despise being controlled without legitimate or reasonable grounds. you can't just tell me not to do something for no reason, and you certainly cannot tell me not to do something for no reason and then go do that exact same thing unless you want to place your own fucking head on the god damn curb while i slam my heel down on your fucking jaw. i fucking HATE hypocrits. fuck em. fuck em all. i just don't really know what to say about this other than the fact that i put up with hypocrisy every single day of my life, and it drives me up the walls, through the ceiling, and to the fucking moon. i hate hypocrits. but you know, that's just me.
 
i'm going to assume that 90% of people can completely relate to this. i absolutely fucking HATE when people talk shit and spread rumors. did you fucking SEE me do what you're saying i did with your own eyes? nope. so do me a favour and shut your mouth, bitch. someone hates you so they make something up and tell people, and those people are IDIOTS and instead of asking about it they tell more people who do the same thing. do you people really have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING better to do with your life? it eventually gets to the point where 50 people are just shooting you looks and whispering, even your backstabbing worthless friends. and i'm honestly not complaining. you wanna talk shit about me? have motherfucking fun, because while your life is centered around me and what i'm doing, i'm off living my ACTUAL life and not the one you're creating in your mind this very second. and why me? are there THAT many things about me that you are so god damn jealous of that you have to spend your time talking about ME? why talk about people? honestly why? i would really like a legitimate reason as to why the fuck all people do is talk about other people. if you don't like someone keep it to your fucking self, because that's no reason to spread shit about people. if someone hates you, do you want them to spread rumours about you? probably not. you can act like a swaggot hater lover fag dick lover whatever the fuck you wanna be called and say that you don't care because haters keep you motivated. SHUT THE FUCK UP. it's people like you that give the human race a bad name. you're basically saying that if some chick told your boyfriend that you deep throated some other guys cock, even though what she's saying is a complete lie, you wouldn't care because she's your "hater" and therefore you "love her" because you "love haters". alright, as long as you make sense. i'll be honest, i fucking HATE when people spread shit about me. they wanna call me a slut? cool, i'm far from a slut. call me a whore? cool, i'm not even close. all people do is mother fucking gossip and it drives me up the wall and through the roof. if you're one of the people who just talks about other people, then it's time to take a close look at the direction in which your life is going. i don't understand the reasoning behind talking shit about people, but you know, that's just me.
 
i think 90% of people are dyslexic to the point that they see the word "halloween" as "let's run around half naked". it's ridiculous. i don't go out for halloween, and i'm not hating on people that do, but if i were to dress up this year i would dress up as a FULLY CLOTHED psycho from borderlands. maybe it's the gamer in me. and maybe it's the fact that i love covering myself up with clothing, but i honestly don't understand how 90% of people see "halloween" and think "GONNA SHOW OFF MY TITS!" like what the fuck, bitch, why the fuck do you feel the need to show off your body? what the fuck is the point? do you think some guy's gonna come up to you and say, "HEY SEXUAL. you're dressed a slutty panda, let's have sex." i think people need to learn how to wear fucking clothes, but you know, that's just me.